Mastering てほしい (te hoshii): Expressing Desire for Others’ Actions

Mastering てほしい (te hoshii): Expressing Desire for Others’ Actions
Meaning & Usage

✨ Basic Meaning

“I want (someone/something) to do (action).”

🎯 Primary Function

To express the speaker’s desire for an action to be performed by someone else.

📋 Grammar Structure

Verb て-form + ほしい
N/A (Requires V-te form of くなる, e.g., 忙しくなってほしい)
N/A (Requires V-te form of になる, e.g., 元気になってほしい)
Verb ない-form + で + ほしい

🎭 Usage Contexts

🏢 Formal Situations

Used cautiously, usually softened with です (~てほしいです) or often replaced by more polite forms like ~ていただきたい.

😊 Informal Situations

Extremely common and natural.

✍️ Written Language

Used in personal writing (diaries, casual emails) or in narrative text to express a character’s internal desire.

🗣️ Spoken Language

Highly frequent, used to express requests, hopes, and desires.

💡 Common Applications

Expressing a personal request or wish.
Used to state a desired action or change in behavior directly to or about the listener/third party.
Example: 早く帰ってほしい。(Hayaku kaette hoshii.)
Expressing a hope for a general situation or state.
Can be used for things other than human actions, such as weather, world peace, or a general atmosphere.
Example: 世界が平和になってほしい。(Sekai ga heiwa ni natte hoshii.)
Expressing a strong plea or opposition to an action (in the negative).
The negative form (〜ないでほしい) expresses the speaker’s desire for an action *not* to happen.
Example: そんなことをしないでほしい。(Sonna koto o shinaide hoshii.)
📊
Frequency
High (Very common in daily conversation)
🎚️
Difficulty
N4 (Intermediate)
Example Sentences
Example #1
友達に私の真剣な話を聞いてほしい。
Furigana: ともだちにわたしのしんけんなはなしをきいてほしい。
Romaji: Tomodachi ni watashi no shinken na hanashi o kiite hoshii.
English: I want my friend to listen carefully to my story.
Example #2
先生に宿題を期限前にチェックしてほしいです。
Furigana: せんせいにしゅくだいをきげんまえにチェックしてほしいです。
Romaji: Sensei ni shukudai o kigen mae ni chekku shite hoshii desu.
English: I want the teacher to check my homework before the due date.
Example #3
もっと難しい日本語を教えてほしい。
Furigana: もっとむずかしいにほんごをおしえてほしい。
Romaji: Motto muzukashii Nihongo o oshiete hoshii.
English: I want you to teach me more difficult Japanese.
Example #4
彼はもう二度と嘘をつかないでほしい。
Furigana: かれはもうにどとうそをつかないでほしい。
Romaji: Kare wa mō nidoto uso o tsukanaide hoshii.
English: I want him never to lie again.
Example #5
静かにしてほしいんだけど。
Furigana: しずかにしてほしいんだけど。
Romaji: Shizuka ni shite hoshii n da kedo.
English: Could you please be a little quieter? (I want you to be quiet.)
Example #6
両親にいつまでも健康でいてほしい。
Furigana: りょうしんにいつまでもけんこうでいてほしい。
Romaji: Ryōshin ni itsumademo kenkō de ite hoshii.
English: I want my parents to stay healthy forever.
Example #7
このプロジェクトを成功させてほしいと願っている。
Furigana: このプロジェクトをせいこうさせてほしいとねがっている。
Romaji: Kono purojekuto o seikō sasete hoshii to negatte iru.
English: I am hoping this project succeeds.
Example #8
私たちをこの重い作業で手伝ってほしい。
Furigana: わたしたちをこのおもいさぎょうでてつだってほしい。
Romaji: Watashitachi o kono omoi sagyō de tetsudatte hoshii.
English: I want you to help us with this heavy task.
Example #9
上司には、もう少し優しくしてほしい。
Furigana: じょうしには、もうすこしやさしくしてほしい。
Romaji: Jōshi ni wa, mō sukoshi yasashiku shite hoshii.
English: I want my boss to be a little kinder.
Example #10
雨が早くやんでほしい。
Furigana: あめがはやくやんでほしい。
Romaji: Ame ga hayaku yande hoshii.
English: I want the rain to stop soon.
Notes & Nuances

📌 Important Points

Exclusively for Others’ Actions
てほしい expresses desire for *another person’s* action. If the speaker wants to perform the action, use the 〜たい form.
Example: 私は本を読みたい。(Watashi wa hon o yomitai.)
Be Careful of Demanding Tone
Because it conveys the speaker’s internal desire, it can sound demanding when used as a direct command. Use softer requests like ~てくれる or ~ていただけませんか in polite situations.
Example: 水を飲んでほしい。(Mizu o nonde hoshii.) / 水を飲んでいただけますか。(Mizu o nonde itadakemasu ka?)
The Agent is Marked by に (ni)
The recipient of the action is marked by the particle に (ni), making it clear who is desired to perform the action.
Example: 彼は私に来てほしくない。(Kare wa watashi ni kite hoshikunai.)

⚠️ Common Mistakes

❌ 私はケーキを食べてほしい。(Watashi wa kēki o tabete hoshii.)
✅ 私はケーキを食べたい。(Watashi wa kēki o tabetai.)
てほしい is only used for the actions of others. Use 〜たい for the speaker’s own desire.
❌ 部長にすぐ返事してほしいです。(Buchō ni sugu henji shite hoshii desu.)
✅ 彼に連絡してくれませんか。(Kare ni renraku shite kuremasen ka?)
Using てほしい in formal or business contexts can sound too direct or demanding. Use polite request forms instead.
❌ 静かにしてほしいです。(Shizuka ni shite hoshii desu.) (In place of a direct request)
✅ 静かにしてほしい。(Shizuka ni shite hoshii.) / 静かにしてください。(Shizuka ni shite kudasai.)
While grammatically correct, omitting the ‘agent’ when addressing the listener can be confusing; using an explicit request (like てください) is often clearer.

🏛️ Cultural Context

Politeness Level: Low to Medium. It states the speaker’s feeling, which can be less polite than an explicit request structure (~てください). Adding です (~てほしいです) softens it slightly.
Social Situations: Best used among peers, friends, family, or subordinates. Avoid using it with superiors or in highly formal business settings.
Regional Variations: The structure is standard across Japan, though local dialects might use alternative final particles or expressions for softening.

🔍 Subtle Differences

てほしい vs. てください (Te kudasai)
てほしい expresses an internal wish or feeling. てください is an external, direct request or command.
When to use: Use てほしい when expressing a general hope or a soft wish. Use てください when giving an immediate, explicit instruction or request.
てほしい vs. ていただきたい (Te itadakitai)
てほしい is neutral/informal. ていただきたい is highly formal and humble, meaning “I would like to receive the favor of your doing X.”
When to use: Use てほしい with friends or family. Use ていただきたい with superiors, clients, or in business communications.

📝 Conjugation Notes

The pattern is formed by adding the i-adjective ほしい directly after the te-form of any verb. Hoshii can be conjugated like a regular i-adjective: ほしくない (negative), ほしかった (past), ほしくなかった (past negative).

🔊 Pronunciation Tips

Ensure that the て-form of the verb flows naturally into ほしい. The ‘ho’ in ほしい is often pronounced with a slight elongation, similar to a standard ‘o’ sound.

🧠 Memory Tips

Think of the structure as “(Action is desired) + (The state of ‘wanting’).” The te-form links the desired action to the feeling of desire (ほしい).

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